Once upon a time there was a little boy who had no one to play with on his birthday. This little boy was turning 57 and his wife took him to Disney world but she doesn't like Disney world long lines, crowds, hot weather, so the little boy had to go by himself while his wife went to cooperate meetings.
The first thing the little boy did was to look for the little boys room before starting off his big day at the park. However all he found was this curious looking room called a COMPANION RESTROOM. This made the little boy sad for he had no companion to go to the restroom with.
EPCOT and world showcase was the agenda for the day. So off to Morocco first he stopped to buy a hat then he went to a Moroccan Coke a Cola machine to buy some liquid refreshment.
The man at the gate gave him a great big button to
wear
while at the park that let everybody know that today was
his birthday. He was so surprised at how many new found stranger/friends he now had, people passing by wishing him " happy birthday" now he didn't feel so alone now he felt like the whole park was celebrating his birthday.
After enjoying the sights and sounds of Morocco off to the United States of America, to the hall of presidents. Could it be anymore creepy 45 dead/ nearly dead presidents come back to life through the world of Audioerotic's or "Disneyfied robots" gee they look so real! of course some yahoo stood up and boo,d Trump. Really....... dude there fake!
Then a slight detour out of world showcase to Epcot's"s THE LAND exhibit. This was most fascinating as they took us into a large green house to show off the hydroponics
exhibit HYDROPONICS most curious they were growing
lettuce however in California all the hydroponics stores just teach
people to grow pot, you know Mary Jane, weed, Maui wowie.
Growing another kind of "lettuce"
About this time I'm hungry and as everybody who knows Disney world knows the food is terrible. As always i went to Mexico, the place was packed got my food couldn't find a seat so i asked a young Asian couple if i could share a table. I took there picture for the blog but for some reason i cant find it,I might have deleted it.
After lunch i continued my tour of World Showcase France,Germany, Italy, Norway and then to the HIGHLIGHT of my disappointment
"Oh Canada."
Yes ooooooooh Canada, you must be the most boring country in the world, your defiantly the most boring exhibit at Disney world. I mean seriously what are you good for? bring back Mayor Ford at lest he was good
for entertainment value. Whats your latest contribution; I don't know whether to hug you or slap you for Justin Bieber jury's still out on that one.
I finish off the day standing in line for an hour and a half in the Norway exhibit so take in the Frozen movie; the ride. Standing in line people to people in an enclosed area i believe was the beginning of the end for this little boys birthday. next morning as i prepared for a day of lounging at the pool i could tell i wasn't feeling well. ZIKA I'm guessing. i couldn't tell you in what country in world showcase i got zika but lets just say watch your ass in Norway i blame you FROZEN.
Staying true to my lounge lizard lifestyle I glued myself to a lounge chair close to the pool of the Disney Yacht club. Which has the best pool. Its a large meandering pool intertwined with a lazy river, waterfalls and secluded coves
I found a nice little spot near the ice cream stand and planted myself for the remainder of our stay in Disney world I only got up to blow my nose and use the convenience. later mama hooters and i celebrated in the room with a $35 small cake (and you know how much the lizard loves cake) purchased from the hotel bakery, in which i eat half the cake by myself in about 30 seconds.
LOVED my Florida trip! Disney world and the Beach's of Florida never let me down "never sad in the sunshine state" This trip, this pool gets a 5 lizard's tails up!
From the Sage of sun, the liege of leisure,
the Sultan of tan: May all your days be suntanned and cash filled!
"THE DARK SIDE OF DISNEY" DISCUSS! OK ill go first, whats this Mr Toad wild ride all about! Apparently hes a toad: and he drives but not very well. He seems to be of some means. Nice Tudor style home nicely appointed, wears a tailored suit but wears no pants, could be disturbing but There,s no bulge so he seems to be able to play it off. I don't really know the story behind the ride however it is a Disneyland favorite. We've all ridden the ride but have we really paid any attention or truly pondered the meaning of the ride.
First of all who gives a drivers licence to a reptile. My guess he lives in California a sanctuary state that provides drivers licence to undocumented toads. However the toad is a horror! on the road he runs through stops signs knocks down constructions sites causing injury's to public servants. The police cant stop him and at some point he rides the train tracks head on into a train. The toad is a terrorist!
Is this the example we want for our impressionable children? then after all is said and done he stands before Judge Judy to be sentenced to HELL! as he should be. Now the really disturbing part, as you take the wheel of the ride you yourself become "THE TOAD" well enjoy the short wild ride but here's the kicker ....at the end of the ride you go to hell.
Yes its true at the peak of a sunny day in the life of the lounge lizard Ricky even this reptile gets off his lounge chair at the fabulous Disneyland resort hotel to take a spin on one of my favorite rides in the magic kingdom.
So from he sage of sun the Liege of leisure and the sultan of tan may all your days be suntanned and cash filled
The Lounge Lizard Ricky
Hey Mon
To escape the long harsh winters of southern California we spent some time in the Caribbean islands. Hooters has this crazy ass friend named muffy who has a villa in st johns. Didn't take much for us to say yes when invited to spend some time with them at the Westin resort and villas. Mama and i were in for some desperately needed sun,tan and pool time. Its was peak season for cruising the Caribbean so all the super yachts were out and about in the waters of the Caribbean. We went to the bathes at some Tortola which was basically massive rocks forming caves near the sea. You had to hike to them and they were hard to walk through so we spent little time there,hard work when on vacation is not what we sign up for.
As you may know if your a avid follower of the lizard Ricky our third favorite activity on our vacations is shopping, and were else is there any better shopping in the world especially for jewelry then St Thomas. It never rained on us so we had to make time to run over the St Thomas to spend some money on new bracelets,cuff links and watches. However most of our time was spend laying on the beach soaking up some local color. The resort set up was great three restaurants, large pool steps away from the beach, gifty shop and food store on premises I was in heaven. On the first full day of the junket I Had a bit of a run in with one of our lovely co-beach goers, I set up my lounge chair, umbrella for my drink, towel, lotion and my small wireless speaker from my apple cell phone music. I put on some jimmy buffett and proceeded to get into my zone. Well the nerve of some people! just as I was wasting away in Margaritaville some east coast uptight white lady asked me to use my ear phones so she didn't have to listen to my music. My music was bothering her. I told her I would turn it down, ooooooooooooooooh but nooooooooooo she wanted me to use my ear phones so she didn't have to hear ANY of it.
Are you kidding me lady! were on an island in the heart of the Caribbean and you don't want to hear Jimmy Buffett! I was out raged!!! I told her that yes i will turn it off and that I don't use ear Phones, they get in the way of my tanning and there uncomfortable to boot.
So I say for the villas of St Johns "Stay loose, Stay tan and stay often" AND stay away for uptight white ladies form the east coast!
A departure from my norm, however I just want to give my two cents. This week on one of he cable news shows was a story of a men who owns a small bakery in Denver,I believe. He was being sued by two gay men who were getting married. They had asked the baker to bake them a wedding cake for their up coming nuptials. The dispute came when the baker refused to bake them a "Wedding Cake" over his Christian held religious views on same sex marriage. He explained that he would be happy to bake them "cupcakes and cookies" for the event but that he would not make them a "Wedding cake"
Now here's were my two cents comes in! I would have refused them just on the grounds they were ugly. Seriously when these two were born the Dr delivered the baby and slapped the mother. I mean god bless, they found each other. Everyone deserves someone to love them. However thank you lord they cant breed.
Hopefully you know I,m joking!............... about them being ugly. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And I'm sure there's some deep philosophical and spiritual connection between them both. With that being said I DON'T GET IT! Isn't this just a lot to do about nothing. First of all "ITS A CAKE"! What, God isn't going to let the baker into heaven because he feed homosexuals. And guys really..........what, hes the only baker in town. If I were the two men I would have called the The Cake Boss on the food network and asked him to bake the cake. Over the controversy cake boss would have probably made a better cake and for free! use your head guys.
I appreciate the bakers views and there,s more to the story I,m sure. But from my perspective is it just over the labeling of the cake. If he was willing to make cupcakes and cookies knowing there for a same sex wedding then change the name of the cake. call it "A Civil Union Cake" or some other gender bending, tie binding title. "Tie the knot" cake. Be creative! had the two parties worked together perhaps the end result would have been successful. Instead we litigate.
Now don't get me wrong when I say its just a cake. I LOVE CAKE especially wedding cake. Me and cake have a relationship that boarders on disturbing. Knowing the Lizard, on my last day there likely to find me dead on a lounge chair with cake frosting smeared all over my dead, tanned face. But really guys, we litigate? what to move forward the gay equality movement one wedding cake at a time.
Charity, is the pure love of Christ. "If you are without charity you have nothing"Our Father in Heaven loves all his children he may dislike the behavior but he loves his children. The lizard believes we are spiritual beings having an earthly experience. We are placed upon this earth for and with a purpose. We can be ourselves but we must be our best selves.
Would it have not been more Christian for both parties to have worked together, instead of what we have now, Controversy and unpleasantness. I don't doubt this good brothers sincerity in his faith, I'm sure the lord knows his heart. Its not like he officiated the wedding and sign the marriage license. What would the savior had done? maybe he could have explained to the the men he doesn't approve of same sex marriage but he would not only make the cake but he will make it his best ever. In this Christ like manner his actions would have built unity instead of division.
As for the happy couple they too could have taken a lesson from the life of our Savior. "Behold I stand at the door and knock" Our Savior doesn't push himself onto anyone he invites unto him. You can't legislate acceptance.
There's lot's to say on the subject of same sex marriage but I promised only my "two cents" As for now I say "What the hell, let them eat cake"
Your voices have been heard! The call has gone out for a current blog. Big goings on in the life of The lizard. The lizard started a new job. As a practicing dispensing optician I've worked for years in the eyeglasses industry in a verity of capacity's. Being a lounge lizard is a life choice however one does have to PAY for this life of choice and all though I'm married to a sales executive, in all fairness i do have to contribute to the family income. Man of leisure is one name, dead beat husband is another. Not to be the latter i have taken a great job with the Kaiser Permanente Medical group in riverside. Just as a side note; however a big side note, I was forced to joined the Teamsters union as a requirement of employment. Which basically just means "OH YA! JUST TRY TO FIRE MY ASS!
As a result of working full time and I've had to change my focus off of my resort wear venture and give myself fully to my "Day Job"which means I've closed down the Lizard Ricky Resort Wear project. Perhaps i will revisit my dream of a clothing line when i retire and have time to work that project....... Who we kidding I'm a lounge lizard I don't want to work! I've barely have the initiative to do this blog! I hate anything that takes me away from my pool and spa time in fact I'm heating up the spa as we speak.
My start date is April 15th I told Hooters, she immediately said WE GOT TO GET OUT OF TOWN! so we took off for Honolulu for two weeks. we do Marriott points so we stayed at the Marriott Waikiki. I love being in the heart of the action I'm not a deserted island person, i want people around! more fun to show off my great swim suits, since i buy a new one every month. The pool experience or me is about SEE AND BE SEEN. I put on my best jewelry, my current swim trunks and pick a lounge chair prominently STAGED by the pool. I do my best George Hamilton look, order a diet coke and strike a pose!
I'm not vain just a realist. You know when you got it, flaunt it. The first night were there we stayed on the 27th floor with a Diamond Head view. I enjoyed it but one of the things I've learned about my WONDERFUL life with Hooters is that the first room is not THE room we will be staying in. We will change rooms. I get it she likes to get the lay of the land.. sort of speak. The lay of the hotel. So what that means to me is get ready with another 20 to tip the bag man again when we move.
WELL! NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF THE TEAMSTERS the very next day after Hooters visited the front desk, that hotel couldn't do enough for us. They sent the men to move our stuff to the total Waikiki beach, city view side of the hotel put us on the top floor and at Hooters,s request put in a reclining easy chair in front of the window for maximum viewing pleasure. All she had to do was tell the hotel manager that I was the head of Teamster local 166 in from California and the rest is history.
One special note, we were there over the Easter holiday and I awoke Easter morning to the trade winds blowing through the sliding door gently blowing the curtains, and in the early morning light I could see the silhouette of Hooters with bunny ears sitting on the balcony.
The two main things I wanted to get done on this trip was one to see the Aulani Hotel and two I wanted to hit all the Tori Richards stores to buy a new wardrobe for my new job. We had a great time, visited many of the favorite haunts of Hooter,s and we both realized we no longer want a sports car drop top to tour the island. There to low,hard to get into and there's no room for a goat. (DON,T ASK). The only time Hooters and I have heated words is on a vacation. Hooter likes to take the car and run to the local Walmart, There she buys new beach chairs, boogie boards, pool noodles and sundry items only to be used for a few days then to be left behind with the guys at the hotel valet. In Hooters defense these items do make for a better vacation although ma
y seem a bit frivolous.
A touching moment for me was when shopping I passed a store window with a picture of Jack Lord in it. I cant help it I'm a child of the 70,s Hawaii five O had a profound effect on me. "PRAISE THE LORD" I shed a small tear.
Ok lounge lizards as always I send you my love! my thanks to those of you who purchased lizard Ricky shirts, And may your life be filled with SWEET SUNTANNED CASH FILLED DAYS.
Paradise Isle Pool Club Open is for the summer! After the poor weather of the month of May; June is starting out great. Paradise isle pool club is now open. New this year is the updated chair cushions and Tiffany colored umbrellas. Hooters and I are looking forward to some serious tanning this summer. Here are some pix and as always may your life be full of"suntanned cash filled days"
The man at the gate gave him a great big button to
for entertainment value. Whats your latest contribution; I don't know whether to hug you or slap you for Justin Bieber jury's still out on that one.
